After the initial intoxication and passion of love fades and the realities of marriage take hold, an individual's true desires, emotions, and behavioral patterns reveal themselves. Gary Chapman, a renowned American marriage counselor, has heard many couples' complaints through his work. After more than 20 years of research, he discovered that everyone needs five "love languages": words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.
words of affirmation
The deepest human need is to feel appreciated. For those with low self-esteem and low self-esteem, this lack of security leads to a lack of courage. In such cases, positive words from a spouse, including encouragement, affirmation, and kindness, can often unleash tremendous potential.
Careful moments
Have you ever noticed the stark difference in how couples behave before and after marriage when dining together? The former gazes intently, while the latter looks around distractedly. A truly meaningful moment must involve focused conversation, a dinner just the two of you, or a walk hand-in-hand. The activity itself is secondary; the key is spending time capturing each other's full attention.
Receiving gifts
Gifts are concrete symbols of love; they are reminders of "I love you." This is the easiest love language to learn.
Service-oriented actions
This refers to doing what your spouse wants you to do, serving him/her, and making him/her happy. When deeply in love, serving your partner is voluntary, even involving considerable effort. However, after marriage, many people become lazy, and this state is undesirable.
physical contact
Physical contact is a subtle way for humans to communicate emotions and a powerful tool for expressing love. Sexual intimacy is one such way of expressing love, but holding hands, kissing, hugging, and caressing are also effective. For some, physical contact is their primary language of love. Without it, they feel unloved.
