If you firmly believe that "there is no such thing as pure friendship between men and women," and you exclude men other than your father and boyfriend from your world; if you have a fight with your lover, and your female best friends swarm in, encouraging you to escalate the conflict until he surrenders; if you can't stop talking about "my husband," checking up on him every two hours and tracking his location in real time... then darling, the gears of your life are turning way too hard! Take a breather, you need a male best friend! They are the best lubricant in your life.
What is a male best friend?
A close female friend is someone you can confide in about anything. The word "close" implies a secret or intimate connection; you can share many things with her that are difficult to talk about or that you're ashamed to discuss with others.
"Best friend" is generally a term exclusively for girls, but with the progress of society, more and more girls are applying this term to boys. What kind of boy can be considered a "best friend"? He's the kind of guy who can talk to girls about anything, is loyal, and is considered a "male confidant" by women. They can confide in him when they're upset, talk to him when they have relationship problems, and even seek his advice when preparing for their first date with a new boyfriend. They can also have each other's partners, and their partners know about their relationship but are never jealous.
A best friend is someone you discuss topics like sex and physiology with most. Therefore, "best friend" is generally a term exclusively for girls. However, with societal progress, more and more girls are applying this term to boys. A "male best friend" refers to a woman's closest male friend with whom she can share anything. There are also different interpretations—the media interprets "male best friend" as, frankly, an extramarital sexual partner.
What is a male best friend? It might sound a bit abstract. A male best friend is less ambiguous than a so-called "male confidant," more honest than a so-called "ambiguous relationship," more intimate than a so-called "backup plan for love," and more down-to-earth than a so-called "soulmate."
Besides your husband, what do you need male best friends for?
Simply put, a male best friend is defined as a pure friendship with a guy that has no barriers between you. He can easily and happily interact with you like a female best friend; and when you encounter problems, he can offer you unique care and advice from a male perspective.
The existence of something implies its reason. Male best friends are highly sought after because they possess unparalleled advantages compared to female best friends. Generally speaking, men and women have different thinking habits; men tend to be more rational and logical, while women tend to be more emotional and meticulous in their thinking. From this perspective, male-female interactions seem to offer complementary strengths. Male best friends are not as calculating as girls, they don't harbor jealousy, and there's no need to worry about them interfering with your interests. This provides women with a sense of ease and joy that they don't experience with female best friends. A male best friend's advice is almost entirely unbiased, more direct and objective than a female best friend's, and can even compensate for some of your personality flaws, allowing you to think about problems calmly. Having an outstanding male best friend can also help you develop your potential through exposure and learning, allowing you to fully explore your interests and hobbies.
10 conditions for becoming a male best friend
1. I will not have any improper thoughts.
Absolutely upright and honest. They won't use the guise of "being kind to you" to take advantage of you.
2. We get along well.
They are either extremely similar to you in personality, able to understand your thoughts like a mind reader; or they are extremely complementary, able to help you consider things that are completely outside your cognitive scope.
3. The boundaries between the two are clear.
Even if she has feelings for you, has considered pursuing you in the past, or might continue to pursue you in the future, she will tell you the truth. There will be no ambiguity in the present moment. Clear boundaries are the prerequisite for two people to be best friends. If you step into an ambiguous space, that's cheating, and it hurts both of your partners.
4. Like best friends
You can have many female best friends, but having more male best friends isn't necessarily better; one or two is enough. A male best friend who can stand the test of time is someone who absolutely trusts you emotionally, someone who is closer to you than a sister. Occasionally, you can even be each other's mentors and support each other at work.
5. Listen patiently
One of the biggest functions of a male best friend is to act as a woman's emotional dumping ground, helping her to become gentle and calm. A man who is like a fuse that ignites easily will only ignite more conflict within you.
6. Neutral viewpoint
A petty, nagging, and narrow-minded man will only impose life's constraints on you, like a shackle on your head, or teach you to stubbornly cling to your flaws and be inflexible. A man who can't offer neutral advice is either full of complaints about life or has ulterior motives towards you. Neither of these qualities qualifies him as a male best friend, and getting too close to such a man won't do you any good.
7. Able to keep secrets
Perhaps after confiding in a female best friend and telling her, "Don't tell anyone about this," all your female best friends will call the next day to ask what happened. A male best friend is best as a safe haven, someone who can discreetly keep your "secrets" that are "not for outsiders to know."
8. Able to give you advice
A domineering man who only wants to possess you, no matter how charming, can only be your boyfriend, never your best male friend. A best male friend can be a safe haven when you're hurt, but when you set sail, he's the one who's there to bless you.
9. Soft yet firm
He needs to be as emotional as you to understand the reasons behind your joys and sorrows; but a male best friend must also be more rational than you, so that he won't share your anger and sadness at crucial moments, but instead offer you calm and effective advice. When you're stuck in a rut, only he can douse you with a bucket of cold water, helping you see the truth.
10. Help each other
For example, if your partner misunderstands his existence, he will never cower away or try to steal your partner. He will sincerely and diligently maintain a suitable distance, demonstrating that his presence is to better protect you without overstepping boundaries. Of course, you must reciprocate in the same way. Because rights and obligations are reciprocal; there's no reason for him to be open and honest with you while you act ambiguously towards his female companion, right? If that's the case, then you don't deserve this male best friend.
A male best friend can share experiences and perspectives from a woman's point of view, which can be a timely wake-up call for a woman, a sharp revelation of her troubles, and a dumping ground for her emotional distress. However, it's crucial to consider whether each other's partners can accept this kind of relationship. Don't forget, thorough communication is the prerequisite for understanding.
