Do people hate people who flaunt their relationships and post selfies? Not really. People just especially dislike those who post overly affectionate and cheesy posts on social media. However, using "couple photos" to subtly show affection is even less annoying. In fact, others will think your relationship is progressing smoothly, and that might actually be the case.
What's the difference between "accompanying photos" and "selfies"?
When people take selfies, they are the main character. Of course, other things might appear in the photo (like a great trip, completing a task, or any other highlight that makes you seem impressive). According to self-validation theory, we want others to see us the same way we see ourselves. If you consider yourself adventurous, your selfie is more likely to show you diving than knitting.
In "couple photos," the "I" element is less prominent, and the emphasis is more on "we." In other words, the main purpose of couple photos is to emphasize the connection between oneself and the other person in the photo. In the science of love, we call the connection between partners "integrating the other into the self," which means the mutual harmonization and fusion of the partners' characteristics or self-perceptions.
Therefore, in a "couple's photo," the partners feel more like a whole rather than two separate individuals. If partners share this high level of intimacy, they not only feel closer to each other but also do things together to show their intimacy. In other words, a "selfie" focuses on yourself, while a "couple's photo" focuses on your relationship. Now that you know the difference between selfies and couple's photos, why is a "couple's photo" important in a relationship?
Eight reasons to take photos together
1. Couples who take photos together tend to have longer-lasting relationships. The more a couple agrees on the concept of "us" (i.e., the greater their sense of "including others in themselves"), the more likely they are to have higher relationship satisfaction, intimacy, and loyalty.
2. When others see your "couple photos," they'll assume you're in a good relationship. But if you don't "show affection," people might think your connection with your partner isn't as strong.
3. Is your partner handsome or beautiful? Taking photos with an attractive partner will make you even more appealing. After all, if you have a charming partner, you must have something special about you.
4. People like to take photos together when they are happy and enjoying themselves – this can enhance the beautiful moments in a relationship, increase emotional intimacy, mutual trust, and satisfaction.
5. What about taking photos with a group of close friends? According to the "cheerleading effect," doing so will make you appear more charismatic.
6. The closer the relationship between couples, the more likely they are to show off things, such as small items in their shared home or post photos together on Weibo, to announce their partnership to the world.
7. Have you and your partner tried anything new, fun, or challenging? This not only creates great opportunities for "photoshoots"—think about it, skydiving, surfing, trying out new restaurants—research also shows that these types of experiences can promote personal growth and improve the quality of the relationship.
8. Finally, even though we've mostly talked about couple photos, don't forget that taking photos with friends and family is also a way to highlight self-identity. In general, interpersonal relationships are a crucial feature of our lives; the more connected we feel with others, the longer we can live and the longer we can love.
Why do people say, "Showing off your love in public leads to a quick breakup"?
Statistically speaking, publicly displaying affection doesn't necessarily lead to a quick breakup; the probability of breaking up is roughly the same for both couples who show affection and those who don't. However, from a psychological perspective, people tend to believe that those who publicly display affection are destined to break up. This is because when people see couples showing affection, those who stay together are often forgotten, while those who break up are remembered vividly. This creates the misconception that publicly displaying affection guarantees a breakup. In short, publicly displaying affection increases others' attention to your relationship, and if you break up, others will remember it all more vividly.
The psychology of showing affection
A study suggests that public displays of affection are not necessarily related to passion. Such behavior is primarily an attempt to demonstrate possession of the relationship, much like wearing gold and silver – a ostentatious display of one's partner. Excessively frequent public displays of affection are often a way for individuals to seek validation from their partner and society. Furthermore, women tend to be more inclined to show off. Men primarily aim to assert dominance, while women seek to enhance their sense of security.
A. The vain type of showing affection
Purpose: Driven by vanity, to make others envious and jealous of oneself.
Methods: Use all means of communication to tell the world about the sweet moments between you and your partner; put on a "real-life love show" in front of relatives and friends.
B. Revengeful displays of affection
Purpose: To take revenge on those who broke up with, divorced, or did not cherish them.
Method: Within the target's entire visual and auditory range, find another person of the opposite sex to stage a lovey-dovey show together.
C. Showing affection by deliberately concealing it
Purpose: To cover up the problems in one's marriage.
Method: To put on a brave face and act like a loving and harmonious couple in front of others, even when the relationship has broken down.
If you think that showing affection is a personal matter, and that you'll be too old to do it if you don't, then you must pay attention to the following safety precautions.
1. Be mindful of the level of detail and avoid revealing specifics.
If public displays of affection become excessive and passionate, it can easily become disrespectful and disturb others. Therefore, it's crucial to keep displays of affection subtle and within acceptable boundaries. For online couples, posting photos and various displays of affection is commonplace. However, in the age of Weibo, it's essential to be careful not to reveal details about yourself and your partner, such as addresses, personal information and privacy, social relationships, etc. Aside from the risk of becoming a potential celebrity sex scandal, exposing any detail lowers your personal safety.
2. Please smile while being filmed.
In stores, we often see "friendly reminders" such as "You are being filmed, please smile." Nowadays, cameras are everywhere. Before you really want to show affection in person, be sure to carefully scout the area. "Infatuation can easily slip away," so always be careful not to accidentally reveal too much.
3. Increased risk of infidelity
The game *The Sims* offers scenarios for "ladies' man" to choose from: taking one lover to a public place like a nightclub or clothing store, sneaking into a dressing room for a tryst, only to be caught by another lover and get a beating; or being intimate with one lover in the same room, only to be encountered by another lover and slapped repeatedly, leaving the Sims utterly timid and crying incessantly under the violence. As mentioned above, if you're so proud as to publicly display affection with someone other than your partner, be prepared for a severe dressing-down or even complete breakdown from your spouse.
4. Thieves are on the loose, be careful.
Someone once couldn't resist being intimate with their lover in the park, only to lose their wallet in the heat of the moment, robbed of everything, and left with no recourse, feeling utterly frustrated. Couples, be careful! Besides scouting the area carefully, it's also essential to be constantly aware of your surroundings.
