After being asked "Why are you still single?" a million times, you've probably already come up with one (or N) reasons that you believe in yourself. But is that really the case? The following reasons sound plausible, but each one has a major flaw. So, don't blame your single status on them; they might just be your most prized asset.
Reason: It's hard for outstanding women to get married.
When you start to achieve success in your career and manage your single life with ease, there will always be someone who jumps out to tell you: all your efforts and success are actually the culprits that prevent you from finding true love.
So, we are advised by so-called "experts" to learn to be "weak little women," to play dumb and hide our sharpness in front of men, and never let him think that you are better than him in any way. Even if you have a doctorate, you should still act like an empty vase in front of his friends... until you want to slap yourself: Why am I demeaning myself?!
Of course, there are indeed some men with unique tastes who prefer women who are physically weak and deformed. But are these men really strong enough? Showing weakness doesn't mean "indicating that you are stupid," but rather "displaying beautiful fragility and vulnerability." Simply put, it means—I am strong, so only a stronger man can conquer me.
Reason: Too picky to find a boyfriend
A comment from family or friends like, "You're so picky!" can leave you feeling frustrated and unable to vent your anger if you're single.
I don't require him to be handsome, tall, own a car, have a house, or earn a lot of money. I just want to find a man I can happily communicate with like a friend, and who also makes me want to sleep with him. But everyone says I'm too picky! When you reject your tenth blind date, the people around you finally get angry. They think you're too picky, as if your only criteria for being acceptable are three things: male, alive, and single. Those reasons that upset you only highlight your narrow-mindedness and shortsightedness: his mediocre career means he's honest and reliable; his constant quoting of his mother means he's filial and conscientious; and the fact that he wants to split the bill for the first meal only shows he has the virtues of thrift and family values.
However, having a lower bottom line doesn't mean we have no principles! How are we being picky? So next time someone blames you for rejecting an unreliable blind date, try replying: "Such a good man deserves an even more discerning woman."
Reason: You don't understand relationships.
Most media outlets and so-called experts on relationships tend to describe dating as a sporting competition—and due to factors such as physiology, psychology, social opinion, culture, and tradition, women are usually the losers, while single men are the biggest winners. They are successful in both relationships, constantly receiving invitations and enjoying the great freedom of being single, like martial arts masters who can pass through a sea of flowers without getting a single petal on them.
Over time, the girls all became shrewd and defensive players. "We agreed to have dinner today, why did he postpone it again? He said he'd call at this time, why hasn't his phone rung yet?" Well, based on years of experience with dating guides, this girl will most likely turn around and walk away.
But have you ever considered that perhaps there's no hidden story at all, and it really is just that careless person who accidentally forgot?
What you really need to do is seriously ask yourself, "Overall, how do I feel about this person?" A hasty judgment and an impulsive decision might cause you to miss out on your Mr. Right. Even if you have a thousand complaints, at most you can give yourself a mental warning and give him a minor apology.
While cunning girls who know the rules of the game can always attract men's attention, the relationships that truly last are the simplest and most straightforward.
Reason: There is no space for men in my life.
You're posting pictures of delicious food, travel, marathons, and charity sales on social media—your life is vibrant, your friends are colorful, and your youth seems flawless. But if you forget to stop your parents, they probably won't be as happy as your friends are in commenting and liking your posts. They'll likely think with a touch of melancholy: Who dares to tame this crazy woman?!
Those girls live fulfilling lives even when single; a rich social life means putting yourself in the spotlight and letting others discover you! If a man is deterred by your exciting lifestyle, it only means he's a stingy person with a weak heart, and you wouldn't want a man like that, would you?
Reason: Being obsessed with work will make men resent you.
Too busy with work to date, a lack of eligible single men in your environment, and the nature of your job making it difficult to settle down... Hey, why not just change jobs? Complaining that a job that provides you with income and security is affecting your happiness, is that really a good idea?
Please look around. Are your bosses busier and under more pressure than you? But surely not all of them are single, right? Surely some of them have loving marriages and happy families? Your colleagues do the same work as you and deal with the same clients, but surely not all of them are single and unmarried? There are indeed so-called "hard-to-marry" professions in the workplace, but none of them are truly "nuns' professions," otherwise the Ministry of Civil Affairs would have intervened long ago.
So don't complain that your job is blocking your romantic prospects; it's actually the best channel to bring you endless opportunities and possibilities. As for what to do? Besides "treating all the men around you as men," learn from your colleagues who are happily in relationships.
What to do when people around you are pressuring you to get married?
State your requirements before pressuring them to marry.
Before your extended family even speaks, quickly state your requirements, such as, "My dream lover must be a peerless hero. I hope he can come to marry me wearing golden armor and riding on auspicious clouds." Upon hearing this, most matchmakers will back down. If, by some stroke of luck, you actually find someone, then politely decline—consider it an unexpected bonus.
Pretending to be heartbroken
When you return home in a freshly broken-up, heartbroken state, your family will most likely refrain from bringing up relationship issues again. However, please remember not to get too emotionally invested, lest your parents worry unnecessarily; and don't let your sadness linger too long, or they might suggest you find a man to help distract you…
Looking for a temporary boyfriend
This is a tried-and-true method in the singles world. It temporarily silences gossip with concrete actions; and sometimes, it even leads to real-life romance!
If a man says, "You're so great," it's just an excuse to cover up his own inadequacies. Should you be heartbroken over this? NO. Be confident and find a man who's right for you.
The above content is exclusively authorized for use only and may not be reproduced without the copyright holder's authorization.
