1. What you can't have always seems more alluring.
Perhaps it's precisely because they haven't yet obtained their partner that people always harbor some expectations and anxieties about losing them before marriage. After marriage, however, everything is settled, the other person is already theirs, and there seems to be no need to strive to maintain or support them anymore. Therefore, the relationship gradually relaxes, which is why many people complain that "things are different before and after marriage." What you can't have always stirs your heart, those who are favored are always fearless, and the one you already possess—once a cherished memory—has become a mere speck of dust, once the white moonlight by your bedside, now just a grain of rice on your clothes.
The biggest difference between married life and dating life is the fading of passion. However, you need to be clear about what you want. Do you want him to revolve around you every day, repeating those same old vows, or do you want a warm, peaceful, and enduring life together? He might send you 999 roses now, but he can stay by your side when you're sick.
2. Why did I make those sacrifices in the first place?
Perhaps you both made efforts, sacrifices, and even gave up things to overcome real-world difficulties. At the time, these became your bargaining chips in winning your love, moving each other and ultimately defeating reality. However, years later, those sacrifices may gradually lead to regret, and you may begin to blame yourself for compromising. You might think that without those sacrifices, things would be very different now. This "different situation" might include career success, higher earnings, and a comfortable life. Dissatisfaction with your marriage may become the reason for your remorse, and this remorse, in turn, will further intensify your aversion to the present.
When married life doesn't match expectations, people habitually comfort themselves with impossible assumptions, but all of this is futile. Making sacrifices for love is an effort that doesn't need to be denied; at least the sincerity and courage at the time are undeniable, and denying it won't change the situation. Perhaps you're just dissatisfied and resentful, but dear, don't doubt your initial efforts. Live in the present, try to use that initial sincerity to make some changes now, learn to discover the admirable aspects of life and him, and don't let marriage dull your sensitivity to happiness.
3. Time is merciless; perhaps he will fall in love with someone else.
Beauty fades, time flies, and time mercilessly steals a woman's youthful radiance. Women especially worry that men will succumb to the endless temptations of the outside world and betray their initial loyalty. Betrayal may be temporary, but not permanent; perhaps just a fleeting thought can shatter happiness. Compared to men, women's youth always fades more quickly, and the longer the marriage lasts, the more precarious this worry becomes.
Regardless of age, temptations are always present. New opportunities constantly emerge; you can't escape them forever. Instead of dwelling on unfounded anxieties, focus on improving yourself. Everyone loves beauty, and marriage isn't a guarantee of lasting happiness. Women should always maintain a love of beauty, constantly improving themselves in terms of hairstyle, clothing, and inner cultivation. With a youthful spirit and enthusiasm for life, you'll never look bad. Taking action is far more effective in maintaining a marriage than worrying.
4. Money is a big problem.
You can live happily even without money when you're young. But as the pressures of reality mount, issues like housing, children, and retirement surface, and financial burdens become a major concern for many after marriage. These issues are closely linked to quality of life and marital happiness. If one day, without financial security, will love also eventually fade away?
Compared to the carefree life of being single, where one person can eat their fill and the whole family is worry-free, the real-world financial pressures of being a couple are extremely intense. Economic foundation determines the superstructure; to a certain extent, money is key to the happiness index of a relationship or marriage. Therefore, couples should prepare financially early to prevent unforeseen circumstances, planning their income, expenses, and future life to avoid falling into such troubles in the future.
5. I am no longer the most important thing in his life.
As marriage gradually settles into a routine, various issues such as work, interpersonal relationships, both families, and even hobbies can make you feel that your status in his heart has declined. Now, many things other than you can distract him; he no longer showers you with affection, and his gaze is no longer solely on you. Perhaps this is what it means for love to fade.
A happy life requires effort, not just sweet words or affectionate gazes. For your shared future, he needs to invest more time and energy in various aspects to achieve progress. Practical effort is far more important than empty promises. Of course, if you feel he's neglecting your needs or spending too little time with you, find an appropriate opportunity to talk to him and find a balance in your relationship, so you no longer feel insecure and your family can function normally.
