"You don't really understand my heart..." Couples entering menopause often fear growing old, losing their charm, and becoming unimportant, which can easily lead to emotional distress and even affect their relationship. Experts point out that because everyone's adjustment ability and pace of change are different, couples need to understand each other's inner struggles, listen more, and offer more support to avoid misunderstandings.
Menopausal women are prone to mood instability
Psychologist Lin Cuifen stated that menopausal symptoms are more pronounced in women than in men. Besides increased mood instability, women experience physical discomfort such as amenorrhea and hot flashes, which can severely impact their mood. Amenorrhea also signifies the loss of fertility, leading some women to worry about losing their feminine charm and confidence in their appearance.
Women going through menopause may also experience two scenarios: one is that they feel they have given enough to their husbands and children in the first half of their lives, and those who were originally very compliant become more assertive and want to live the life they want; the other is that they feel empty and unimportant because their children have grown up or even left home.
Male menopause is prone to midlife crisis
While men may not experience as pronounced physical symptoms of menopause, they can still feel emotional distress, especially due to role transitions that can trigger a midlife crisis. Psychologist Lin Cuifen explains that men going through menopause may retire from the workforce and struggle to find a focus in life. They might try to apply their company management style to the home, only to fail to gain the expected approval or even be disliked. Men at this stage may also be more prone to infidelity due to concerns about losing their attractiveness or a desire to relive their youth.
Self-help and other-help to deal with emotional distress
Psychologist Lin Cuifen suggests that dealing with these emotional distresses requires self-help and the help of others. You can try self-guidance methods, combined with abdominal breathing. When you inhale, tell yourself that you are aware of these uncomfortable situations, and when you exhale, tell yourself "I can take care of these emotions" to enhance your positive energy.
The support of one's partner is even more important; more praise and encouragement can put their mind at ease. In addition, how to adjust to life after menopause should also be discussed together. Psychologist Lin Cuifen reminds us that "communication" is not about rushing to speak, which will turn into only saying what you want to say. You should listen first, preferably take some summaries, and confirm whether the other person means it before giving your opinion to avoid misunderstandings.
Expressing your physical and mental state and emotions in a timely manner can also prevent your partner from accidentally stepping on a landmine. If you have an illness, don't avoid seeking medical attention; proper treatment can prevent increasing your emotional burden.