1. Do something completely outside your usual personality. For example, if you never like wearing hats, go buy one! If you usually wear black, try cobalt blue or purple. If you don't like parties, go for it—you never know what might happen. And if nothing happens, so what? At least you can celebrate your own attempt.
2. You might think you're too clumsy and will never learn to knit. Go ahead and try. Or you might always think you have no artistic talent, try taking a dance class. Make sure whatever you're doing is outside your comfort zone. Keep at it until you get better—nothing is more satisfying than mastering something you never thought you could do.
3. Prepare thoroughly before the interview or performance. Practice speaking in front of a mirror, friends, or family. Record your voice on your phone, then listen back to check how it sounds and avoid raising your pitch at the end of declarative sentences. Also, avoid using words like "for example" and "uh," as too many interjections can indicate a lack of confidence.
4. If someone makes sexist, racist, homophobic, or discriminatory comments, calmly and clearly ask, like actress Emma Stone, "What do you mean?" Don't argue; just bring the topic into the open.
5. When using the restroom at a fancy restaurant, hold your head high and walk as if you were on your own turf. Don't feel inferior because of it. The same applies in other situations; remember to walk with your head held high and your chest out.
6. Talk to people picking out vegetables at the supermarket or market and ask them which ones are fresher. Do this at least twice a week, and you'll find it much easier to talk to strangers in the future.
7. Tell your parents (relatives or married friends) to stop asking when you're getting married. Unless you want to, there's no need to answer anyone. Dating advice from your elders may no longer be applicable. Times have changed, and not everyone realizes it.
8. For each negative thought, come up with four positive thoughts to counter it—pay attention to the variation. For example, negative thought: I can't believe I said such a stupid thing at lunch. Positive thought: I handled this tricky situation very well.
9. Date yourself. Go to a new restaurant, or a favorite old one, and treat yourself to dinner. Or be a real radical and take a spontaneous weekend trip to a strange city, and remember, alone.
10. On your next date, choose the restaurant or movie theater yourself, instead of letting your date do it. Be proactive, instead of always being the one passively communicating.
11. Be brave and take risks! Try things that are "elsewhere" and require physical exertion. Can you imagine yourself skydiving and surfing? Try the new climbing wall at the gym. Why not? What others can do, you can do too.
12. Exercise, exercise, exercise! Hiking, swimming, cycling, discovering a new jogging route—change your daily exercise routine. Life isn't just a monotonous commute between work and home; you can't go wrong by making your life healthier and more fulfilling.
13. In the office, take credit for your work as part of a team. Women have often hesitated to claim credit because they feel it makes them appear aggressive and selfish—this is ridiculous. If things go wrong in a team project, try not to blame yourself, but to work on solving the problem!
14. Go see a movie with your boyfriend? I suggest a movie that is "very feminine". You've already watched a lot of sports programs with him, haven't you? Besides, having him watch a movie you want to see with you can also subtly let him know your preferences.
15. Consciously avoid procrastination at home or at work. This is usually due to perfectionism or anxiety about not doing well enough. So first, make a good plan, prioritize what you need to do, and then complete it.
